My letter to God; reflecting on 2014…🍃

Spent some time yesterday journalling my reflections for the year. It’s one of my favorite {& most important} little rituals I do every year, and it helps me have proper closure so as to embrace a brand new year.

10:57am
Sitting next to the fountain after my hair-cut {going over to Kim Robinson never fails!}, enjoying strawberry milk petit donuts and a time of refreshment while I reflect on 2014.

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I’m here, Lord. 

Choosing to make space for moments…intimate, soul-cleansing moments with You. Choosing to pause in between my days, to say that I’m here, and I’m waiting upon You as I listen to what You have to say to my heart.

It has been a difficult year, Father God. I didn’t expect it to be so tough when I started the year on 1st Jan 2014 – a morning full of hope and wishes and so full of longing dreams .

At times, in the midst of unexpected heartaches and frustrations, I honestly have quietly wondered if You were even listening to my prayers and understanding my deep pain. My tears would roll but I would soldier on and on with a brave smile to the world but in me was a fragile heart that was feeling weaker and more broken as bleak weeks drew on…desperate for just a glimpse of what You were doing…what You wanted me to embrace. What Your gifts were.

True to Your faithfulness, as the months flew past, I have understood more and more on how You have been displaying Your love to me, and how You were always right beside me, through the tears, the emptiness and the joy. Always right beside me, never leaving nor forsaking me. Your presence, in itself, is a gift.

I asked for You to reveal the treasure that this year of pain and brokenness have brought, because I know that no matter what life appears to be, You are always, always good. And even when life tears us apart into a million broken pieces, You are the Potter who’ll lovingly piece together every shattered part to make us into something even more beautiful than before. Something so beautiful that Your glory is stunningly displayed.

On Sunday, through a usual night of devotional reading, You clearly answered my question by saying, “Treasure. You are my Treasure, Jacinta.”

I couldn’t help but break down and cry. You mean, me? I’m the treasure? Your Treasure? My mind could not readily believe it, but my heart knew deep down what was true. Yes, I am God’s Treasure. So beloved. So cherished. So precious.

What an amazing truth.

Truth that my soul really needed to be comforted and strengthened by.

I texted my Snr Pastor’s wife that very night and shared this with her, that knowing that I’m God’s Treasure – is my Treasure of 2014. I am His!

She rejoiced with me, and our hearts rejoiced with how good and amazing God is.

I’m here, Lord. I’m going to spend the close of this year waiting and listening to You, Father. Speak to me, as I wait for You to show me what next year will bring…

11:54am
On my way to Carol’s home now. Got some additional groceries for her since we’ve decided to bake some scones too, yum. Sioleng is free to join us, yay! It’ll be so much fun.

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Gifts. There’ll be so many gifts in store next year. Is one of them friendships, Lord? I sense You’re leading me to invest a lot more time in people’s lives next year. My family, my friends, people I encounter…brought about by Your divine grace. After all, everything in this world will pass, but Your Word and the souls saved will be eternal. May I be wise in the time spent next year, that my days will not be wasted away, but invested into the lives of Your creations.

6:14pm
Sigh, always so hard to part with Carol. Sipping on hot chocolate {seem to be having it quite a lot these days} and savoring the wonderful afternoon spent at her place with Sioleng & Sheena. It’s always nice to gather at a friend’s place and just chill…but especially nice when it’s with sweet people.

Keep me updated on things that happen in your life, Carol said as we hugged and bade our goodbyes. It will pass, I tell myself. The reluctance to see her go will pass, and we’ll develop a new routine again, and catch up when she’s back next April. Sometimes, I just wish such precious moments can be frozen in time.

Oh Father, just help me to flow with your Flow…Holy Spirit, help me to just be still. To absorb this moment with thanksgiving, knowing that even having such friendships is grace in itself.

“Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.”
– Dr. Seuss

Going to get some toiletries for Bren, and head home for dinner. My heart is full from savoring a very enjoyable and memorable afternoon. An afternoon of getting to know friends a little deeper, learn baking tips from Carol who has so much to teach, learning also to be open to new experiences, new friendships and reminding my soul that God’s kingdom is so much bigger than what I can even imagine. And yes, as Carol reminds me, God has His perfect plans for me. 

Yes, thank You for Your perfect plans…

7:11pm
Bren bought beef sandwich back for our dinner. Lugging a whole lot of stuff and on my way home now. Looking foward to spending some time together, perhaps popping by the mall after dinner too.

God seems to be inviting me into the new year with a renewed sense of adventure. An openness to new experiences and new people to meet. My heart is trembling just a tad, but mostly, it’s excited. Getting into a new groove is an adjustment. After all, the new season is completely different from what I’m used to. But God is going to prepare me step by step…one new experience at a time. And it’s going to be okay…in fact, it’s going to be God-filled.

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It’s the time of year for us again, to dream and make certain choices…Lord, help us to remember You in the midst of it all.

Enjoy the last day of 2014, dear friends…🍂

Counting down to an exciting new year, and counting all of His gifts to us, one at a time.

God bless you! 💝

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3 thoughts on “My letter to God; reflecting on 2014…🍃

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